1. |
Headlight Holds A Deer
03:46
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There ain’t no troubled water
No bridge for me to cross
Just space and time and learning how to cope with what I’ve lost
some will come a running
Some won’t shed a tear
Some of them stop in their tracks like a headlight hold a deer
It’s just this darkness
A fog that rolls right in
Leaving me defenseless
But I have learned to live with it
I would like to shine a light
and leave it on display
View it now from every angle
so I can walk away
I will tell you everything I know
no issue I won’t discuss
At length and depth bin swallowed whole
and I’ve brushed away the dust
I’ve been lost for decades I’ve got painful souvenirs
Whatever ghost you fear the most
Will whisper in your ear
I’ve come to search the narrative for tiny fragments of the truth
Help me now with the puzzle piece excavated from my youth
It’s just this darkness
It’s a fog that rolls right in
And I’ve got no defenses
I’ve learned to live with it
And it gets harder with every new sunset
Forever relentless
I play the cards I get
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2. |
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They say you can’t win it
That you’re never ahead
They say it so sweetly
Must think my feelings are dead
There’s no way to kill it
When you’re blinded by fear
Too soon to tell if
It all disappears
I try not to listen
But sometimes it hits home
I got a nagging suspicion
I guess I’ll go it alone
Maybe I’ll waver
Just a second of doubt
And just keep my head down
Until I figure it out
Everyday just finds a way to kinda lose it all
There’s no way I’ll ever change
just trying to break that fall
You see it’s everything or nothing at all
When the seconds are fragile
And your mind it is Doomed
Lost in the minutiae
Where anxiety’s fueled
And there’s no way to shake it
Well you’re blinded by fear
It’s too soon to tell if
We’ll all disappear
Everyday just finds a way to kinda burn it all
Above the flames just out of range is when my mind stalls
Seems like it’s everything
or nothing at all
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3. |
Flight Risk
02:10
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You gotta try and try
You gotta dodge the motherfuckers
Cuz they’ll always keep on coming
And there’s never any cover
You gotta try and try
You gotta dodge the motherfuckers
Cuz they’ll always keep coming
And there’s never any cover
I light another fire cause I’m always on the run
The lack of all dilemma is a cosmic suckerpunch
You gotta try and try
You gotta dodge the motherfuckers
Cuz they’ll always keep on coming
And there’s never any cover
You gotta try and try
I will rise above it.
You gotta keep moving
cuz they never get enough
All the dark engines running in the night are
Annihilation missions purpose built for flight
No hills on fire no beacon lights
No identifiers of any kind
No hills on fire no beacon lights
No identifiers of any kind
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4. |
When It Goes Badly
03:12
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I could be dumb dead
Sleeping in an alley
Well, didn’t matter to me
I got lost walking in the valley
Well it could’ve been 1993
When it goes badly
After burning so bright
Trying to make sense
Of a hopeless situation
Feels like dying in the middle of the night
When it goes badly
You’re alone in the darkness
Nothing said we’ll ever make it right
We got lost walking in the valley
Well it must’ve been 1993
When it goes badly
After burning so bright
When it goes badly
Feels like dying in the middle of the night
I could run red lights into tomorrow
Well it don’t matter to me
Spinning out in the intersection
Leaving everything I own right on the street
When it goes badly
After burning so bright
All the little things
Adding up to nothing
It’s just you and broken pieces of your life
Trying to make sense of a hopeless situation
That’s eclipsed almost everything in sight
We got lost walking in the valley
Well it must’ve been 1993
When it goes badly
After burning so bright
When it goes badly
Feels like dying in the middle of the night
You could be dumb dead
Sleeping in an alley
Well, it don’t matter to me
We got lost walking in the valley
Well it must’ve been 2003
When it goes badly
After burning so bright
Trying to make sense
Of a hopeless situation
Feels like dying in the middle of the night
When it goes badly
You’re alone in the darkness
Nothing said we’ll ever make it right
Feels like dying in the middle of the night
We could run red lights into tomorrow it’s all that matters to me
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5. |
Tangled
03:17
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Kinda get a little
tangled in the middle and it’s
Getting away from me now
All the little pieces excuses and the reasons they’re
getting me down
And we don’t learn a thing.
Take it all for granted wake up a little frantic
like it's all some free ride
forever complicated just can’t negotiate it
Can’t sleep at night
And we don’t learn a thing.
Sailing into something
With the baggage that we bring
Hands are on the wheel
Not sure that I feel
But I say
It’s not me now
We just keep on moving
Reload and keep shooting we’re just lost at sea now
We don’t learn a thing.
Sailing into something
With the baggage that we bring.
And all I know for certain is we can’t take everything
Kinda get a little
Tangled in the middle and it’s
Getting away from me now
All the little pieces excuses and the reasons are
Just getting me down
And we don’t learn a thing
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6. |
Hotel Room
03:06
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I’ve been down for a thousand years
In a hotel room furnished with fear
Projecting images of confidence
I don’t remember when I laughed like that
Watching this whole world collapse
Into its own consciousness
Heard that sound for a thousand years projecting
Images of fear
I wish that they’d just get on with it.
And I know that you can’t relate
With everything you have to take
And everyday just rages til the end
Burn it all and turn the page
Overkilled and understated
Til every word disintegrates again
I roll that rock up and down that hill
In a hotel room with unpaid bills
Neglecting everything that’s obvious
There I am walking down that hall
The elevator mirror says I’m ten feet tall
What’s wrong with us
And all that pounding between my ears
The elevator music drives me to tears
And I just can’t sing along with it
I can’t sit around sit around sit around here
I won’t sit around sit around til it’s this time next year
Sit around sit around living in my fear
I can’t sit around sit around til it’s this time next year
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7. |
Neon Rome
03:10
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Traded in the static for the darkness and the cold
and the generator’s dying now and I’ve been put on hold
just a running on a program that’s severely insincere
Got a murder hornet cornered
where do we go from here
I said from here
Just a running on a program that’s severely insincere
When we traded in the static
Where do we go from here
I said from here
Traded in the static for the darkness and the cold
A generation’s dying now and I’ve been put on hold
Tearing through those city lights
It just gets faster by degrees
Calibrating the cost it’s all just so meaningless to me
Moving through those city lights
It just gets faster by degrees
Calibrating the cost it’s all just so meaningless to me
A neon rome is playing just inside my frontal lobe
Time and space and motor skills have kept the volume low
Naked and erratic pretty soon we won’t exist
But the drop down menu offers nothing nice to go with it
I said from here
We traded in the static for the darkness and the cold
And a generation’s dying now and I’ve been put on hold
It ain’t getting any better with the neurotoxin glow
Doctor Friedman tells me sweetly that there’s nowhere else to go
It’s a perfect pixelation that has left no stone unturned
It’s a careful recreation and we should let it burn
Tearing through those city lights
it just gets faster by degrees
Calibrating the cost it’s all just so meaningless to me
Bow down I just won’t bow down I just can’t bow down
And there ain’t no way around it
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8. |
Ashes
03:01
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Dumped the ashes in the ocean
On the street and in the cold wind
Can’t get a grip on this life
I ain’t getting any wiser
Just colder and ukninder
No matter how hard I try
I guess I’ll try a little harder
For this whole thing is darker
And I know there is no one else to blame
Maybe I’ll swim out a little farther
Try it on for starters
Hold my breath, swim beneath the flames
And when the days just ache awake
Through the mist time hurt and hate
Sun dies on the horizon
Looking for a fire to put my hand in
To light the darkness that I stand in
No matter how hard I try
Maybe I’ll swim out a little farther
Try it on for starters
Hold my breath, swim beneath the flames
I guess I’ll try a little harder
For this whole thing is darker
And I know there is no one else to blame
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9. |
Psychotropic
02:46
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As I look over I’m detecting some resistance
I don’t think I’ll let it slide this time
I can tell you I might question your existence
I can thread the bullshit through the fucking needle’s eye
Forever shaking the motives of the mindless
Just to watch everything unwind
There’s nothing new here you’ve simply been outdistanced
Again I’ll thread the bullshit through the fucking needle’s eye
Sewn into the lining a perfect poison skill
Your psychotropic drugs are playing havoc with me still
Decades of survival now this whole thing is real
The weather vane is spinning
But it’s me who is here still
Is here still
Is here still
Running through the chaos right up in your grill
There ain’t no fucking payoff I’m just paying off those bills
Decades of survival but it’s me who is here still
Is here still
As I look over I’m detecting no resistance
I think I’m gonna make the flight on time
I for one have never questioned my existence
I learned to thread the bullshit through the fucking needle’s eye
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10. |
Pilot Light
03:21
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Careful now we’re so close to the end
Can’t remember half the things that we said
It’s gone longer than the runway’s pavement
Can’t course correct it now. cause I can’t take it back
Cheap flight and a one way ticket
Relight the pilot light
Maybe I’ll get outta if this tonight
Cheap flight and a one way ticket
Relight the pilot light
Maybe I’ll get outta this tonight
Stare it down, nothing more I can do
I’ll blow it up or I’ll I see it through
Going longer than the runway’s pavement
I can’t course correct it now
cause I can’t take it back. take it back
Airport lounge
Ignore every text
Hear my name paged
on the public address
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11. |
Rink
02:14
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I can tell you
it’ll bury you alive
And all you ever have to do is blink
There are cracks
As you skate upon the lake
It’s never quite as solid as you think
Well I will tell you
It goes unnoticed as you skate.
Oblivious to everything and all
It falls to pieces
This life’s not for the faint of heart
And you don’t see the sun until you sink
Tear it 2 pieces
As your climbing to the top
Drag yourself along this frozen ridge
It’ll kick with everything u got just to get the fuck right out of this
Rebuild the pieces it’s not for the faint of heart it’s intricate and delicate and frail
I can tell u it can bury u alive and all you really have to do is think
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Headstones Toronto, Ontario
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